Taking Care of Yourself First Isn’t Selfish
Taking care of yourself first has been the theme of the past couple of weeks — and I didn’t even realize it at first.
Michelle tells me all the time that I put others above myself. She says I’m wired to give. I hold doors open. I help with luggage. I clear plates off tables even when we’re on vacation. I assist people who look overwhelmed.
It’s just how I’m built.
But on a recent early morning flight from Tulsa, Oklahoma to Fort Lauderdale, something hit me differently.
During the safety presentation, the flight attendant said the words we’ve all heard:
“In case of emergency, put your mask on first before assisting others.”
That line stuck.
While that’s not exactly what Michelle means when she talks about balance, it rang the bell.
The Leadership Lesson in Taking Care of Yourself First
Taking care of yourself first is not selfish.
It’s sustainable.
On vacation, I still found myself doing what I always do:
- Holding doors
- Helping strangers with overhead bags
- Clearing cluttered tables
- Offering assistance without being asked
Being on vacation doesn’t mean we stop being good citizens.
But here’s the reality:
If you’re exhausted, drained, or emotionally depleted — you cannot lead well.
You cannot serve well.
You cannot show up well.
Taking care of yourself first allows you to continue serving others at a high level.
10 Days at Sea — and a Surprising Peace
We spent ten days on a cruise ship.
And surprisingly, not once did I hear a heated political or religious debate.
Maybe that’s because most of the guests were over 50. Maybe they’ve learned arguing rarely changes minds. Or maybe they were simply focused on enjoying life.
Whatever the reason, it was refreshing.
People were laughing. Relaxing. Living.
Sometimes stepping away from noise is the healthiest decision you can make.
The Flight Home — When Noise Replaces Peace
The contrast came on our flight home.
Three women who had just met launched into a loud conversation covering everything from religion to abortion to gay marriage to politics.
Everyone from row 3 to row 24 could have written a report on their debate.
Let me be clear.
I love my Lord and Savior. I will gladly share my faith and experiences with anyone who asks. But I don’t shove it down anyone’s throat.
And politically? We all have the right to believe what we believe.
What concerns me isn’t disagreement.
It’s hostility.
It’s volume.
It’s the desire to win instead of understand.
When someone asks what you believe, be cautious. Not everyone is asking to learn — some are asking to argue.
That flight was the worst experience I’ve had flying.
And it reinforced something important.
Protect your peace.
Taking Care of Yourself First Protects Your Impact
Taking care of yourself first protects your mindset.
If you allow every loud voice into your mental space, you will burn out.
If you try to carry everyone else without pausing to breathe, eventually you’ll collapse.
The oxygen mask principle applies to:
- Leadership
- Marriage
- Business
- Faith
- Everyday life
You cannot pour from an empty cup.
Taking care of yourself first is not weakness.
It’s wisdom.
If you want to understand more about where this mindset was forged — from dirt roads to defining life moments — you can learn more about my journey here:
👉 Learn more about my story and book:
https://donnieweddle.com/book/
Watch the Full Travel Experience
I’ll be sharing the full trip experience — the good, the humorous, and the uncomfortable — on my YouTube channel in upcoming videos.
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https://www.youtube.com/@The74501
This series is about faith, adventure, leadership — and growing in real time.
Because growth doesn’t just happen on islands.
Sometimes it happens at 30,000 feet.
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